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Hollywood actress Nicole Kidman stood before congress last month on behalf of UNIFEM, calling for an end to violence against women.

The actress, who was in Washington to testify in favor of the International Violence Against Women Act, admitted that Hollywood can perpetuate negative stereotypes by portraying women as “weak sex objects”, but was quick to point out that she had “no interest” in such roles.

Although Kidman is clearly committed to her post as Goodwill Ambassador for UNIFEM – she traveled to Kosovo in 2006 to meet with abused women and helped launch an advocacy campaign in 2007 – I wonder if the organization would have benefited from choosing another, more suitable, spokesperson.

While it’s undeniable that Kidman has built her career upon a foundation of talent and hard work one need only look at her to see that she too has fallen victim to society’s sexist ideologies. In recent years Kidman’s taut forehead has made her into an unwitting poster child for excessive cosmetic surgery; last week, images of the actor’s apparently immobile face seemed to spark just as much online debate as the actual lobbied cause.

While I don’t believe there’s anything inherently wrong with plastic surgery, I find Kidman’s insistence that she is “completely natural” unsettling. I’m equally disturbed by the way that “role models” like Kidman endorse society’s collective fear of the aging woman by freezing their faces beyond the point of recognition.

The idea that a woman’s allure can only be maintained through youth constitutes a double-standard that is, at its root, abusive. The fact that UNIFEM has opted to elect an ambassador who has, by her own actions, perpetuated negative beliefs about feminine beauty is curious to say the least.

A woman who is paralyzed by insecurity often requires as much counseling as a woman who has suffered at the hands of a man. Perhaps UNIFEM would benefit from acknowledging and mentoring women who have inflicted abuse and self-denial upon themselves.

They can start with their own ambassador.

[photo by deepchi1]

French immigration minister Eric Bessom initiated a debate on French national identity last week, declaring that the country should cease to tolerate burqas – the head-to-toe covering garments worn by many Muslim women – arguing that they run counter to the country’s equality values. Bessom’s statements echo those of French President Nicolas Sarkozy who spoke out against the burqa in June of this year, declaring that the “oppressive” garments are “not welcome” in the territory of the French Republic.

Bessom has not called for a ban on the burqa but the country is considering the option. Despite their minimal presence in France, the garments of Islam have been a point of heated debate for some time: In 2004, a political firestorm erupted when France proposed a law prohibiting Islamic headscarves and other visible religious symbols from appearing in French public schools. A slew of public debates and demonstrations followed.

As contraversial as the garments of Islam may be, legislating a full-out ban will do little to help France’s cause. Any law that prohitbits a woman from wearing a burqa is every bit as tyrranical as the traditions that brought the garment into frutition. While some outsiders view Islamic garments as a symbol of oppression, there are women who don burqas as an expression of free will. To deny a person the right to dress as he or she pleases demonstrates a blatant disregard for human rights.

The “fight” to advance women’s freedoms should not be rooted in coercion. Rather than attempting to prohibit public displays of the burqa, the government of France should empower its citizens with freedom of choice. The most effective way to create positive change within a society is through education and open dialogue – not legislation.

It is only when the government of France begins to view burqa-clad women as equals – instead of as “prisioners” in need of rescue – that an amicable resolution can be achieved.

There are lines everywhere.  They’re all over her face.  There are lines where there repwere no lines before. Things have started to droop. And her period?

Yeah, that’s gone. It’s been replaced by hot flashes.

She stands in front of the mirror pulling and prodding.  They said that sleeping on silk sheets would help, but they didn’t.

They said a diet of antioxidants and wheat grass would take years off of her face.  They were wrong.

She wears sunscreen, she doesn’t smoke, she gave up alcohol, and she’s sworn off caffene. She went to Sephora and bought a $250.00 night cream. She goes for facials twice a month.

And still …

There are lines everywhere. They’re all over her face!!

Nature is a bitch, isn’t it?  it’ll do what it has to do and doesn’t give a damn about you, your fancy night creams or your wheatgrass smoothies.  Even the best cosmetics won’t stop wrinkles completely.

There’s only one way to get rid of ‘em.

You gotta freeze the f*ckers.

Yup.

You have to freeze your face so it doesn’t move anymore. You have to get a needle and inject chemicals into your forehead that will prevent you from physically showing human emotions.

Sure, you won’t look natural – not by a long shot – but that isn’t the trend nowadays. The trend is to fight aging at all costs. The trend is to be 40+ and have skin smoother than a 14 year-old’s.

When I think of overly botoxed women,”beauty” doesn’t pop into my head. “Wax figure” does.

And who do these women think they’re fooling, anyway?

I’ve been told that one of the best things about aging is the confidence that it brings.  Confidence, in my opinion, is incredibly sexy and it isn’t something a needle or a cosmetic cream can give you.  If you were painfully insecure before botox, you’ll be painfully insecure after it, and an immobile forehead reeks of desperation.

I hope that by the time I’ve reached my 40s, I’ll have shed all of my ridiculous insecurities.

Sure, the media is hard on women.  So is society.  It’s sad that most of us will never realize how beautiful we are, au naturel.

Still.

No matter how insecure you get, no matter how badly you want to rid your face of the teeny tiny wrinkles that have begun to develop, remember:

Having a  couple of wrinkles is A LOT better than having a face that looks like this:

Eeeeeeeeeeekkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk !!!

Screw birth control and the right to vote.

Being able to attend university is nothing more than a “nice to have” and having the right to own property – so you can pack up and leave the husband who routinely beats the sh*t out of you – is only somewhat important.

While these things have granted women some small comforts nothing can compare to the power of the washing machine.  It’s done more to liberate women than the entire feminist movement.

That’s According to the Vatican, anyway.

L’Osservatore Romano, the Vatican’s official newsletter, published an article over the weekend entitled, “The Washing Machine and the Liberation of Women – Put in the Detergent, Close the Lid and Relax.”   The article – written by a woman no less – argues that although the “debate is heated” regarding what has granted western women the most freedom, some would argue that it has been the washing machine.

Um.

What?

Granted I wasn’t alive back when women had to wash everything by hand, but really? is that the best they can come up with?

Who needs women’s suffrage? we have washing machines!

I mean, knowledge is power and all but nothing beats having a fresh-smelling apron.

Right?

Right???

Ugh.

To me, the article is the equivalent of a condesending pat on the bum.  It spits in the face of the brave women who have fought, and continue to fight, for our basic human rights.

And now my head hurts.  In light of that, I’m off to partake in an activity that’s liberated humanity far more than any machine.

If you need me I’ll be at the bar, downing a vodka on the rocks.

For a long time, my teeth didn’t line up quite right.

My left canine was a little higher than the rest and I’d spend hours in front of the mirror, staring at it. “There’s nothing wrong with your teeth,” my mother would say. “They look beautiful.” Of course she would say that. She’s my mother.

I eventually saved up enough money to get my teeth fixed and then I shelled out $350.00 to have them whitened but it didn’t stop there. It never stops. There is always something that needs to be fixed.

Teeth. Hair. Skin. Nails.

Intellect?

Yes, that too. But intellect always comes as an afterthought.

I spent my morning reading about the Gaza Strip but then I walked past a mirror and noticed my split ends and I made an appointment with my hairdresser. Seems like every time I have some extra cash I’m running somewhere, or to someone, asking to be fixed. And when I am fixed I am happy. Until I see a girl who is prettier than me.

The extra time and money never goes to worthwhile things. I only use it to fix things. The money never goes towards things that could make life better for me and for others.

I’d like to become move evolved. Perhaps one day I will.

Not today, though.

It’s early morning in Kandahar.  The sun is beginning to shine through the clouds and a slight breeze is in the air.  Within a few hours it will be hot – a little warmer than usual for October.  The children seem to enjoy it; a small group of them weave in and out of rows of baskets and tables as their parents set up shop.  Soon people will begin to flood the bazaars, in search of anything and everything.  Despite the wars and the misogyny consumerism appears to be alive and well.

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